3 Phrases Women Should Stop Saying — And Why It’s Time to Reclaim Your Voice
- Cassie Yoder
- Jul 29
- 2 min read
Updated: 3 days ago
By Cassie Yoder, Founder of Cass Concepts & Business Coach for Women Who Want to Lead with Confidence
Your words shape how others perceive your authority—and even more powerfully, how you perceive yourself. Whether you’re running a business, leading a team, or speaking up in a meeting, your communication style can either open doors… or quietly close them before you even realize it.
And here’s the kicker: Most of us were never taught how to use our voices powerfully. In fact, many women were taught to do the opposite—tone it down, be polite, don’t be “too much.”
But here’s what the research tells us: Assertive communicators are perceived as more competent, persuasive, and trustworthy (Stanford & Yale studies). Softened language—what psychologists call hedging—dilutes our presence and authority.
It’s time to stop minimizing your voice. Let’s break down three common phrases that women use far too often—and what to say instead.
1. “I’m just…”
Why it’s harmful:The word just is a subtle self-sabotage. It shrinks your presence. It sounds like you’re asking for permission or apologizing for having something to say.
Science says:It’s what linguists call a minimizer. Studies show it undermines how confident and capable you appear—especially in professional environments.
Try this instead:
“I wanted to check in about…”
“Here’s what I recommend…”Take up space. You’ve earned it.
2. “Sorry, but…”
Why it’s harmful: We’ve all been there—apologizing for sending an email, asking a question, or even existing in someone’s peripheral vision. But constant apologies signal guilt or unworthiness.
Science says: Research by Schumann & Ross (2010) found that women apologize more than men not because they do more wrong—but because they perceive more things as apology-worthy.
Try this instead:
“Excuse me—can I add something?”
“Thanks for your patience.”Stop apologizing for speaking. You are not a burden.
3. “I think…”
Why it’s harmful:It sounds harmless, right? But leading with “I think…” weakens your statement before it even lands. It’s a built-in disclaimer.
Science says: Dr. Linda Carli found that tentative speech (like “I think” or “maybe”) significantly reduces perceived credibility—especially for female speakers.
Try this instead:
“Based on my experience…”
“Here’s what I see…”Or—get this—just say the thing. No qualifiers. If it’s your idea, we already know it’s what you think.
Confidence isn’t about being loud. It’s about being clear.And clarity starts with conscious language. Your voice matters. Your ideas matter. And you don’t need to shrink yourself to make others comfortable.
Let this be your permission slip to take up space—with purpose, with power, and without apology.
Want to Learn More Confidence-Boosting Phrases?
We’ve created a free downloadable PDF with even more everyday phrases to avoid—and powerful alternatives to use instead. It’s your go-to cheat sheet for speaking with clarity, confidence, and authority in any setting.
👉 Download the PDF Below!
Because your words matter—and the world needs to hear them.
